the .: fyr :. light

Someone snapped at me today and it reminded me SO much of how I used to snap at people … just a couple of months ago. And something hit me … our entire existence has become about the THINGS in our lives and not so much the PEOPLE. My problem used to be that I had so much to think about and accomplish and people just kept bugging me for more and more commitments. It got to be so much; too much to handle almost. And so I ended up snapping at people left, right and center for little things.

I remember my supe telling me that people liked me but that they were never sure what mood I might be in and how to best approach me. People usually waited to see what mood I was in first just so that they didn’t get their heads bitten off.

That must have been a pretty difficult situation to be in. Like approaching the lion in his den and never sure whether today is the day he bites your head off, or just snarls in your general direction … or whether today he will actually be sleeping or just lazy enough to allow you to do what you have to.

Anyway, the point was this: I am going to make an EXTRA special effort from here on out to NOT be snippy with people, regardless of how agitated or annoyed or depressed or angry I am.   I did make this promise to my adopted sis, that I would think before I struck out in anger .. give into that knee-jerk reaction …. and I think I am actually doing better at that …. but this experience has just driven it home.

The person who is at the receiving end has NO idea what’s going on in my head, and really can’t be expected in any reasonable way to understand and commiserate with my state of mind.  Yea… I gotta remember my own deer-in-headlights feeling today and try and keep that in mind the next time I am ready to let go on someone.

Sshhh DJ … don’t think I don’t hear you back there muttering about DNA again. hmph!

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