the .: fyr :. light

I jump into GTalk with a friend today.  We exchanged the usual greetings and they go “Know what I notice? You don’t seem to need to rant and rave anymore” … my jaw was on the ground. I know they were referring to my blog, but it still floored me. So I dove in and asked them to explain.

Pretty much, my blog has become (and I quote) ” much lighter, breezier, more approachable “

Of course, that last one especially just floored me through the floor. My exit interview at my former workplace educated me – apparently a few of my co-workers found me unapproachable. The comment was (and I quote again) ” we don’t know when you’ll be in a good mood or not so we aren’t sure how to approach you. we usually wait for you to clue us in before we say anything to you “.  It had shocked me at the time, but a few minutes reflection right then and there had me realizing how people might see me like that.

But more astonishing than even that is reflecting NOW over all this are realizing how much of a change there has been over the last year and change … so much so that people notice it through my writing! How amazing is that, huh?

Lighter … breezier … more approachable … frankly, that’s how I FEEL these days. And even on days when I pissed out HELL about this temporary position I have preparing taxes and how BORING it’s gotten since tax season slowed to a halt … it never spills over into anything else – well not really. Hubby complains now and then about my moods, but he knew how moody I was before he married me, eh? I guess it’s just harder to deal with when it’s in your face. And even so, I get over within hours … not days and weeks as it used to be, and piling up and over on top of what was there festering before.

So anyway, I decide to run the concept by my best friend, Yolospat … and her comment was that it was all true and THEN some. Then she goes “you can add humble to your new list of personality traits” and I am like “funnily, i always thought of myself as humble” and her response was “can’t be humble if you’re a fire-cracker”! At first I laughed at that, but then thought about it said to myself “WoW. So true! My! How I became the kind of person I always despised.”

My friend-who-would-like-to-remain-anonymous called me “Camille 2.0″ and Jenny goes “more like Life 2.0 – all-encompassing changes”.

So, that segued into the whole concept of my not blogging as much as I used to. Cos I used to blog at least once a day, and sometimes twice, three times even. These days weeks go by before I do a post like this one… and the plain simple reason is that who wants to hear all my warm-fuzzies daily? Seriously …

It’s not that there aren’t things that bug the HELL outta me still and make me wanna tear my hair out or pull out a shotgun. Oh no – in fact, I recall feeling like that just yesterday morning when someone pulled out onto the highway in front of me – me going at 45mph and they going at 25mph. I was like “WTF?!!! I thought I left this shit back in Jamaica!”  Honestly, though, the frustration and irritation left me almost immediately. I didn’t even think about it again until just now while going over all this in my head. It’s not that I don’t have rants and raves anymore, it’s that they don’t stay with me long enough for me to get to my keyboard and type them out. The attitude is what is different now. I HANDLE these things better than I used to.

Frankly, folks, what is the point of ranting about the sheep out there when the only person who is getting worked up is me? I have so many other issues that I need to think about, plan, enjoy, see, experience … it just isn’t worth my time and energy.

The SMALL things in life now give me the greatest pleasure … I got a call just now. These days, I screen my calls because the number of spam calls I get is ridiculous. Not recognizing the number, I sent this one straight to voicemail and checked THAT later.

It was UPS calling.

You heard me.

Last week, I sent off our beloved PS3 to Sony for repair. It had stopped reading discs. About Tuesday, I got an email saying they were sending it back to me. This call was to tell me that it was scheduled for delivery for tomorrow and that no changes could be made until the delivery was attempted. At which point, my delivery guy would leave me a note with some options on how to handle delivery thereafter.

I was overjoyed. Technology is so fantastic. Imagine that. It wasn’t a REAL person who called, but nevertheless, I found it extremely pleasing.

We .. this generation .. have no excuse for not enjoying life. I mean we DO have things that have made life harder (joblessness, pollution, worsening global weather, increasing cost of living, etc), yet there are things that make life so much simpler too. Decades ago, anything you sent off to be repaired was likely to take months before it got back to you and more often than not no one would be able to tell you when to expect it to be returned either.  In fact, my father became one of those fathers who learned how to fix things himself – simply because it cost less in the long run to do so.

Sometimes it just gives one a totally different perspective and appreciation to sit back and compare things … then and now. Makes one realize just how good we have it now.

More than that … if we were able to make it this far, and this easy – because WE were the ones who made things this easy – then we can overcome almost anything from here on out. Life affirming, isn’t it?

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